I'm not one of those people who have been working on something... As in a dream or a passion.
I'm someone who has finally dropped out of school two times and just started working I different jobs.
I've been fired and I've quit too.
My expectations were to be family with people I work with, but that never really happened... Some people I thought I was cool with ended up showing how much they hated my presence.
It sucks to feel this way, even now... Except one thing was good.
The job I'm in is somewhere I excelled it more than any of my other jobs and I could finally work by myself.
Other times were bad since I get all sensitive and emotional about what I think people are saying or thinking about me.
Yesterday night felt like the very worst and I didn't expect to tough it out... I was literally at the brink of quitting the job because of many things or just a few.
Because I was mentally there and I was lacking speed... Even though last week before I called in sick for the third day of the week, I was doing well and I had a lot of thank you thrown at me like confetti or something.
I wanted to change my schedule so I can help out my mom around the house and other to stay awake around the time I'm dating my boyfriend.
But I thought of ways that are a few to do work and also be attentive with my family and my boyfriend... I can pretty much be alright with my online friend even though she's at school when I'm snapchatting her... And trying to see how she would respond to my paragraphs of messages.
We played this game on Facebook too that she suggested so that was a nice idea.
So what I would do is id come home from work; drink tea; eat cereal; shower; watch anime; and then go to sleep when I'm legit tired even though I should be sleeping sooner but I gave insomnia so whatever.
That's for days I don't see my boyfriend because other times he had picked me up before. And I would like to be picked up on Mondays instead of asking him to pick me up from my work... So I can shower and feel better.
Still going alone with being by myself, this is what I would do to clean up and stuff for my mom : I would do the same thing as above but instead of watching anime, I would sweep the floor and do lite clean up so when my family wakes up, they have a clean slate of what to work with in the house while they get ready.
I could switch the anime around to just doing lite chores. I think that would be best... I'm not sure... These are just me planning my stuff out in hopes they will work.
Oh there is food involved as in ill cook foods I can fridge and have throughout the week. I'm not sure how to make things healthy but hey, eggs and rice!
It would be great to have spam too... I don't want stuff to spoil that's why I'm afraid to fridge food. And my mom might throw my food away too but she didn't throw away my salad.
Now for my boyfriend and me : I would keep up with the overnight schedule by exercising in my house since he usually does at night. Also to have breaks and lunch at same time I have for my work. Then I would do the same thing as I have said of what I would do after getting back from work. But this time not do lite cleaning... I'd actually just space out.
I'm not sure if these plans will work, but I hope they do because I don't want to quit my job. I pay more stuff with my pay check more than I have past years. Next month I will be paid three times so I hope to give all my due rent to my step dad.
I know I will be farther away from my boyfriend and my work... And that I will be paying for my commute more than now. So having a car would be the best to commute. I will get rid of the fear of driving. I do have an app to test me too... Even though I got wrong answers here and there.