Lovino stared at his blank ceiling and let out a sigh. It had been a couple weeks since school started and he was still trying to figure out how to ditch Antonio. He tried being harsh, he tried being cold, he tried blatantly ignoring him, nothing worked. He turned over onto his stomach and let out a groan of frustration. Why the hell wouldn’t that fucking idiot get a clue, did he have a broken internal danger detector or something. “Fuck.” Lovino cursed as he turned back onto his back.
Whether he liked it or not Antonio had started to occupy his thoughts more and more, and that was a bad thing. That meant that he was starting to mean something to Lovino, which meant that being harsh would be harder, which meant it would be harder to get rid of the bastard. It didn’t help he was harder to get rid of than a fucking stain on your nice tablecloths, a nice attractive stain with pretty eyes, but still a stupid fucking stain.
He groaned in annoyance again and started punching his pillow. “Dio cazzo dannazione fucking hell Odio il fottuto bastardo scopare tutto cazzo cazzo cazzo figlio di una cagna bastardo damn everything to-”
“Fratello?” Feliciano said timidly, poking his head into Lovinos room. “Are you okay?”
Lovino turned and glared. “Do I sound okay Feli? Do I look okay? Does anything about this fucking situation lead you to believe I’m fucking okay?” He snapped.
He saw Feliciano curl in on himself a little “No, I guess not, mi dispiace I didn’t mean to bother you Lovi”
The look on his brothers face made his heart sink a little bit and he sighed. “Feli don’t look like that, I’m sorry. It’s just.... Antonio.” He said defeated
Lovino watched as Feliciano's face lit up and he bounced over to sit across from him. “Oh! What about him? Why do you sound upset? He’s always around you, Lovi someone finally likes you!” He chattered excitedly
Lovino shook his head. “Feli the bastard doesn’t like me he just wants a friend thats all.” He said annoyed looking at his hands in his lap.
He felt Feli bounce excitedly in place. “You like him don’t you!? You like him and he likes you!” He sang
Lovino felt his face burn and he looked up at his brother. “I don’t like that idiot!” He protested.
“You do, you do! You’re blushing you- Ah!” Feli sang before Lovino pushed him off the bed. “Fratello! That was mean!” He shouted pouting.
Lovino just smiled sweetly and shrugged. That was before he wound up being pulled down by Feliciano. “Fuck you Feli!” He shouted before pushing his brother down.
The brothers started arguing and westling before they heard a bang from the door. “You two better not be hurting each other or you’re paying the goddamn medical bill” A strict voice said from the door.
Feli jumped up. “Sorry nonno!” He said, his eyes wide and jaw slack.
Lovino laughed, he looked like a deer in headlights. He watched as nonnos face softened and he sat in front of them. “I’m only kidding Feli, I’m not that harsh on you boys.” He said as he patted Feli’s head. “Just here to tell you it’s too fucking late for your fighting shit and you have school tomorrow.”
Lovino groaned and fell back onto the floor. “I don’t want to, nonno can I skip?” He asked.
He heard his nonno laugh and moved his hand from over his eyes to glare at him. “I’ll let you skip with you are actually going to all of your classes anyway.” He said.
Lovino rolled his eyes. “I have all the materials, I do my work and ace the tests. Besides the actual lessons are boring.” He muttered annoyed.
“Besides Lovi, you can’t skip. Antonio will miss you!” Feli exclaimed.
Lovino turned to shoot him his darkest glare. The fucker brought it up in front of nonno, shit. He watched nonno’s eyes light up the way that Feli’s did. “Antonio? Lovi, you never tell me anything about an Antonio. Who is he?” He questioned.
“Fuck off you old bastard, I’m not telling you shit because he’s nothing.” Lovino growled looking down at his hands again.
His face was burning, his heart felt like it was going to leap out of his goddamn chest. He heard nonno stand up and probably motion to Feli to go out based off of Feli’s quick retreat out of his room.
“Remember Lovi, just be careful. You know that you have to be more careful now that you’re older.” He said softly
Lovino nodded, but didn’t answer. ‘Trust me old man, I know better than anyone how much of a monster I am.’ He thought.
His night was filled with nightmares of accidental deaths and painful memories. He would never be able to have love Lovino concluded sometime after midnight. He was too dangerous, he couldn’t put anyone else at risk.
Dio cazzo dannazione Odio il fottuto bastardo scopare tutto cazzo cazzo cazzo figlio di una cagna bastardo - god damn fucking hate the fucking bastard fuck all fuck fuck son of a bitch bastard